Randomlocke Challenge 4: HUURGHRGHRGRUHUHHG

Current Roster

Last we saw Snazzy and her rambunctious puppets, poor Suwhackjob was taken out at the fire gym, leaving Wish without her eternal rival. New friends were found and the party enlarged, what adventure awaits for our seasoned trainer and her impatient puppets?

Swag: To have reached such strength already...fufufu... Wish: Even I didn't evolve that fast. D: Judge: ...it seems unfair, but lives like these never are, are they?

Swag: Yes, I can already feel it...

Wish: THE PUPPET GODS HAVE LISTENED!

Judge: I...I don't know what to say. I'd like to thank my mother and father, for whom without I could not be here, and all my childhood friends that pushed me towards the top. Skittles: What? Judge: And Skittles, for remaining calm during my...less than desirable mental state throughout all this. Skittles: Oh uh, you're welcome?

Wish: I liked it better when you were 75% hat.

Judge:  ...

Haruka: This seems like a foolish matchup.

Swag: HA! Fire does not scare me! Those who foolishly attack without merit deserve no mercy!

You want me to what? Why? Do I get a prize? Stupid old men and their stupid lazy as--

Skittles: Maybe there will be new puppets there?

...GIVE ME THE KEY!

 
You will never regret this!
 
Flankhole: This place gives me the creeps. Wish: YOU CAN TALK!? Judge: ...we can all talk. What makes her different from the others? I suppose since she hasn't said a word 'till now... Wish: I thought she was our mascot or something...

Why is this place deserted? Were all the employees like "THE POWER IS OUT EVERYONE'S HOMEFREE!" and ran the fuck out of here? Swag: They must've sensed my approach. Wish: Ohh, we got a badass here. Too bad you aren't of the evil water type to fit as my new rival! Swag: You must've missed my fight earlier.

Wish: Should I blow it up?

What? Of course not! We're only here to turn the power back on.

Haruka: How uneventful.

I found no Touhous there. You absolute liar.

Judge: He said nothing of the sort, it was Skittles.

SKITTLES!

Skittles: I said MAYBE! Why'd you have to call me out!?

Judge: I was merely correcting our owner.

Skittles: You were better 75% hat.

Judge: ....

Oh look, it's my favourite type of puppet, FLYING TOUHOUS!

Haruka: I don't see a problem with--

Haruka: ...you dare mimc my only sense of individuality!? Swag: Okaaay, guess I don't really need to do much here.

Mostly because I killed them with other people.

Wish: Huh, this double battling thing is pretty lame.

Judge: But you were whining so much about...oh forget it. There is no arguing with you.

Who is this again? Skittles: The letter guy. Oh...I see. Hello.

Skittles: You didn't even show him being caught.

BOX'D FOREVER!

Wish: Whoa whoa whoa! Who's this attractive lady!?

Swag: That's a guy.

Wish: ...still very attractive, much more than you.

Swag: You do realize I am also a guy?

Wish: At least he wears pants.

Wish: This one's hotter than you too.

Swag: Oh for sunflower's sakes, I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK.

Wish: So you admit you're uglier than a flying catfish?

Swag: Sure, whatever.

Oh right, those horrible flying puppets were those reporters' touhoumons.

Judge: Fire punch!? Of all the most generic and unappealing of moves!?

Wish: Hey, it's just a stupid news program.

Skittles: ...this feels backwards.

CYuugi: Greetings my friend, I hope we have a good and friendly spar he--

FWOOSH!

Wish: What was that?

Lolice: Have you seen my mama--

FWOOSH!

Wish: No experience at all! C'mon!

Skittles: So very glad I'm no longer a wild CNazrin...

Wish: That seems familiar...ah well!

FWOOSH!

Haruka: She didn't...she didn't get the chance to scream.

Skittles: Thankfully the rain has kept this area from bursting into flames.

Wish: Sweet, I can kick people in the face instead of having to use my arms. I hate using them.

Swag: What? Fisticuffs are the most traditional form of harm, you should not disregard it!

Wish: You're only saying that because kicking people would reveal your pan--

Swag: DO NOT FINISH THAT SENTENCE.

Wish: ...talons? 

Swag: Your face is spared for now.

 So if everyone hasn't forgotten yet, Flankhole's also training with us!

Flankhole: No need to pay attention to me. I relish in the shadows.

Skittles: You...you don't say.

Flankhole: All maniacal laughter will be done outside of your hearing range.

Skittles: I...I see.

Haruka: Do not worry, this one will not harm any of us so long as I'm here.

Skittles: HARUKA! Shit! Flankhole: I'll take care of this.

Haruka the TIchirin

Level 25 - 42

Skittles' sole protector

I feel like that was out of left-field. Skittles: It was! Not only was he level-headed-- Wish: He could destroy ALL our horrific obstacles with steroids! Skittles: I was going to say a true friend. Wish: Oh yeah, that too. Should've known the typing on that puppet, but alas we must continue forthwith. Judge: He will have a fair and just trial. Do not worry.

Our number of fallen has become far too many. We need our own Broken.

Judge: Broken? Pray tell who might that be?

Skittles: Oh no no no no, you are not taking her out.

Relax, she'll protect every single one of you.

Skittles: Or alternatively EAT ME ALIVE!

Wish: Jebus Skittles, when did you get so paranoid?

Skittles: When I found out the average mortality rate of the Nazrin!

I guarantee you this one will keep us all safe and cozy. Say hi to uh, Huuurg everyone!

Huuurg: Huuurggghghhh....

Flankhole: I like her already.

Skittles: AUGH!

Wish: YOU!

Wow I didn't even tell him to do anything before that poor Kaguya was ripped apart.

Wish: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A "POOR KAGUYA"!!!

...I'll be quiet.

 

Flankhole: Too bad I didn't transform earlier, could've prevented that untimely death.

Judge: That skirt's length is...

Flankhole: Does it make you tremble in sheer terror?

Skittles: No? Not at all?

Flankhole: Drats!

Certainly was the last thing that poor bastard saw.

Skittles: What a way to go.

Huuurg: HUUURUHRGHHRGGHHHH

Skittles: Oh GOD no, it's too early! I must prepare!

Swag: Calm down mouse, she's only a zombie.

Skittles: ONLY a zombie you say!?

Huuurg: UUURGHHHHH...oh that's better. 

Skittles: ...she can talk?

Flankhole: I can talk.

Actually, she's a he.

Huuurg: Well yes, technically this body is of a male specimen, but sadly those vital areas seem to have ro--

Judge: TOO MUCH INFORMATION.

Huuurg: My apologizes ma'am.

 
Wish: So while Flankhole gets burned alive, tell us about yourself! Flankhole: Hey! Huuurg: Ah well, I was actually having a thoughtful discussion with a being named Morality inside the box. Morality? Err, you should stay away from him. Bad influence and all. Huuurg: On the contrary, he brings up many valid points about the state of puppetry and our species' rights. Did you know the Yoshikas are thought to merely be brainless monsters that feast on other puppets' brains? Preposterous! Er yeah, what a travesty.

Flankhole: Why am I still fighting this thing.

Huuurg: ...and he tells me of these humans, in particular these groups who call themselves Aqua and Magma, they wish to bring massive changes to our world's geography for their own selfish gains! I do hope for the sake of all us puppets that you will do something about this.

Wish: Hey, those Magma folks are a-ok in my book!

Yeeeah, don't listen to Wish. His opinions are a bit...out there.

Huuurg: Yes, I've heard all about this Wish character. Morality especially detests you, it seems.

Wish: Well fuck him too!

Wish, language.

Oh, speaking of which, we`re now in a rather isolated building filled to the brim with these shady Aqua people.

Wish: The WORST people!

Flankhole: Huuurg, you are cool in my book. Let`s be friends.

Huuurg: We shall work together to end this drivel negatively impacting our ways of life.

Huuurg: Oh my, maybe this foreign emotion isn't lost upon me after all...

Wish: Oh c'mon Huuurg, at least fall in love with the...well you're right, there's only old hags and jailbait to choose from.

Swag: That's an old man.

Wish: Oh YOU would know.

Swag: ...

DEATH TO ALL TEWIS! Actually I just want a lucky egg, but will never find one.

Judge: One must practice patience to locate such valuable items.

Or OWN A NAZRIN! Skittles, where's my loot?

Skittles: ...Huuurg, I agree with your sentiments.

So yeah, just going through all these Aqua grunts' weak as hell puppets.

I think we're fighting the admin or something, I DUNNO THESE SCREENSHOTS WERE TAKEN OVER A YEAR AGO WHAT HAPPENED HERE?

Swag: I have this document here that says "because I have green hair, I am responsible for noting every moment my owner breaks the fourth wall" ...okay.

Swag: You have green hair too. Why the hell am I doing this?

Judge: I have too many other matters to deal with over such trivial nonsense.

Like nuking that HEirin amirite?

Judge: ...nuking?

Wish: Nuking! LIKE WHAT I JUST DID!

Mein gott, that poor admin is on fire!

Skittles: D-do we have a water-type in the house!?

...

Judge: The absence of Suwhackjob is a dire one indeed...

Swag what are you doing? That Ran was attempting to put out her owner with her mud!

Swag: Well she didn't do a good enough job, did she?

Judge: The number of blacks on this team...

Flankhole: THAT'S RACIST!

Judge: No I meant...oh why do I ever bother?

Wait, Team Magma regularly torches your members?!?!

Huuurg: I wouldn't be surprised if that ruffian was actually a member of Magma at this rate...

Flankhole: You mean Wish is a SPY!?!?

Guys calm down, Wish isn't a spy

Wish: Of course not!

...I think

Wish: ...what!?

Dude in Distress: But you have very...brutal methods...

Forgive us, a few of my puppets are unfortunately poorly trained

Wish: See Judge? If only you had more discipline.

Judge: It is in my nature to tell you off and yet your colossal stupidity just leaves me speechless.

Look Wish, we need to talk later because this is seriously--

Oh god wh--

 
Skittles: Uh, should I pray for her life now?

Wish: It's another Mokou!!! THIS IS MY BATTLE! Silence Wish! Judge, you will defeat her! Judge: Understood.
 
Judge: The heat...is this what Wish's victims feel like? Wish: HEY! I'm not letting some poser do the burning! THERE IS ONLY ONE FIRE TYPE HERE-- Wish, orb. Wish: Wha-- *orb'd!*

Judge: I've got it under control. Alright, Huuurg, you take the next!

Huuurg: HUURUUHuhRHUUHGHRGHH Flankhole: Er what? Huuurg: My apologizes, a few of my moves cause me to go blind with bloodthirst. Skittles: Oh not another one! No worries, Judge is back in action!

Judge: We're going to need more firepower besides myself.

You're right...Wish, you must hold back. For the love of god if you burn more people I am releasing you forever!

Wish: Alright! You could've asked! 

Wish: There!

Good, good, see isn't this better? 

Wish: ...

Now you can take the next one.

Wish: ARGHRGH WATER! MY GREATEST WEAKNESS!
...whoops. Judge: Nothing is wrong, Snazzy. This is merely karma. Swag you finish this off.

Swag: I don't see what the fuss is. Overkill is my favourite game.

Swag: You see?

Wow, I don't think she even noticed...huh.

Uh yeah, nothing to worry about...haha...ha.

Oh hey thanks, this is quite useful. You're being pretty nice despite my first impression... Maribel: Well you are my rival, wouldn't want to have an advantage over you or nothing, even if you were somewhat...unpleasant when we first met. Well, your hat isn't...THAT diapery-looking Maribel: That doesn't mean you have to instantly go back to...look, just...watch your Mokou okay? I heard what happened. Oh fuc-- Maribel: *flies off* Well you heard her Wish, we need to have a talk--

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE! Scott: ...uh, is this a bad time? YES. Scott: Ohgoodluckonyourfurtheradventuresbye! ...are there any more interruptions?!? ... GOOD! Wish, come here. Wish: Shit.
 
Flankhole: I guess we'll deal with these things ourselves? Judge: Yes, that one is a Kyouko, can be shrill on the ears. Be careful.

Judge: And THAT...is a colossal doll. Skittles: No scouting report on that? Judge: I don't judge that which is not sentient. Huuurg: Ah, I must be exempt from the afterlife then... Judge: What? You are clearly a sentient being. Huuurg: Well, Morality has told me that I am indeed not, and instead my body belongs to him.  Judge: You know what? I think you need a lecture as well. Huuurg: Ah, the infamous 'Eiki Lecture! To experience such a touted speech, I am not worthy. Judge: ...how will I even approach this?

Wish, I don't know what's gotten into you lately. Are you just...overly excited from all the battling we've done lately? Do you need a break? Wish: I don't need a break...I feel perfectly fine! When I first caught you, you were an adorable innocent CMokou, with the whole world ahead of you to explore! There was no ill-will in those eyes at all! Wish: Nonono, don't start reminiscing! Look, I do feel like I'm getting a lot stronger and it's...harder to keep my fire in control. But that doesn't make any sense! You're not a Flandre at all! Wish: It's not like this has been happening all the time, just recently... Recently? ...hmmm, do you remember any particular patterns? Wish: It was after...after....our friends were killed... ! Wish: But that doesn't make sense either! I'm definitely over those now. Don't worry!  No, that makes perfect sense! Wish...you realize you are a puppet right? A Touhoumon of sorts. Wish: Yeah? What does that have to do with... You're based on a real person, a girl named Mokou. Of course, I wouldn't say you're anything like her but... Wish: Aw, I thought I was based after a guy. Because pants. Oh, well...see Mokou, Mokou is cursed with immortality. Wish: Cursed? Not being able to die seems awesome to me! Oh no, just because she is immortal doesn't mean her friends are. Wish: ...oh. And one day, Mokou just went insane. She couldn't take it anymore. Wish: Wow, that...that sucks huh. Eventually she calmed down, but during that time she was very destructive...just like you are being. It's just a theory but I guess, you being a Mokou means you get a lot stronger after tragedy, but at the same time, a lot more dangerous to everyone around you. Wish: Should I not be fighting with you guys then? I don't want more people to die! No, you are my starter. I'm taking you with me no matter the challenges...it was a previous Touhoumon's wish of mine, after all. Wish: Well I'll try to hold back some more okay? Sorry for being all reckless and such. If this theory is correct then none of it is your fault. Let's go back to the others.
Current Roster

A/N: Yes, exposition/text city at the end there...totally am not planning out these plot points or whatever, considering I updated this...I dunno, after 5 months!? Well at least it isn't dead. At some point my "WISH KILLS EVERYTHING!!" attempt at humour was getting old and crossing the line, and I just read a million nuzlockes recently with these amazing dramatic stories, so I figured that'd be a suitable explanation? Ah well. Here's hoping the next update is in sooner than five months.